Writing an autobiography gives you a glimpse into your life: past, present, and future. Mostly an autobiography is reflective. Meaning that you’re looking back at past events. However, you can also examine the mistakes you’ve made and write a future free of these mistakes.
There are a lot of stories where I wish I would have done something different. There’s nothing like reviewing my life to give me a bright view of all of my frailties.
When I recall specific incidents, the blood still rushes to my face.
But what is it about failures, even past failures, that embarrasses me so much? Why do I find it difficult to confront failure?
Staring in youth, we are programmed to see failure as bad. “Don’t mess up!” “Don’t miss any questions!” “Let’s see A’s on your report this quarter!”
In school, teachers reward only the kids who conform to their way of thinking. Experimenting with ideas outside the status quo brings failing grades.
Additionally, failure extends beyond the boundaries of right or wrong answers in the classroom. Failure also includes failing to live up to expectations: rational or irrational. “I’m disappointed in you.”
All too many times, we turn over our own definitions of success to others. We all define success in every area of our lives, intentionally or not. If we don’t have our own definition, we will find that we work on others’ success and not our own.
The point is that we want to be successful. So much so, that we avoid, no we shun/evade/steer clear of/stay away from new opportunities if we perceive a chance of failure. Let me rephrase that, we dismiss growing chances because we’re too stinkin’ afraid.
Too stinkin’ afraid. It’s a shame, really.
We need to change how we think about failure. Recently, I saw something on YouTube. Yeah, YouTube. I guess they have some worthwhile videos. I bumped into a video about Spanx founder, Sara Blakely. Her father used to ask his kids what they had failed at in the previous week.
Again, he would ask how they had failed. Not how they succeeded. Completely different questions.
The question about succeeding encourages mediocrity. The children would be tempted to try only things at which they knew they could succeed.
You’ll find success, as you accept that you might fail. Seems paradoxical. But it’s the only way.
Have you truly fallen short recently? Truly?
I’m not suggesting that you say you’re going to try something new and then either purposely fail or fail to try.
Get out there and do something you’ve never done before.
18. There are infinite things at which to fail. What have you always wanted to try? Go out and try it. Now.